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Flies on the Ceiling
January 27th, 2007 Daily Life

As I stumbled into the kitchen for a late night snack, I could tell they had been waiting for me. Spontaneously generating in every dark corner, dangling from the walls. Fruit flies. Drosophilae.

I’ve been looking everywhere for fruit that may be rotting, or some other vegetable mass that may be breeding these pesky bastards, but to no avail. The Internet tells me that I must throw out all sponges, used mops, and cracks in the floor where they may be quietly breeding. Estimates vary, but apparently the fruit fly can lay 30 or more eggs a day. One pair of fruit flies in ideal conditions (a pile of dirty mops the size of Texas or something) could engender enough descendants to fill in the orbit between the Earth and the sun in about half a year. Like a Dyson’s Sphere gone horribly wrong.

There’s a story in Love and Rockets where the devil threatens to visit Izzy in the form of flies on the ceiling. What type of flies is not specified. I think fruit flies are more sinister precisely because of their lack of sound. They can sneak up on you, who knows what they’re doing when you are asleep.

It’s only a matter of time before I go out, buy a flyswatter, and rain down a path of destruction. Maybe I’ll just use a rolled up magazine. Maybe I’ll just sit here and continue typing.

Anyway, this is my blog. According to Technorati there are 175,000 new blogs being started everyday. Like fruit flies they are breeding in the dirty mops and cracks in the floor. And I’m one of them.


Read the Comments

Comment from Steven Gould January 27, 2007, 10:16 pm (#3)

I always had good luck with a vacuum cleaner with attachment hose and all the long attachments. You can get the flies and suck them to their dusty deaths.

To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life’s but a walking shadow

So, a blog is but a walking shadow…or a fruit fly.

And the adult fruit fly lives, on average, two weeks. Hoping Wonderoom does better than that.

Comment from LauraJMixon January 31, 2007, 7:27 pm (#6)

Fortunately, no one takes a rolled up newspaper to us bloggers….

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